Monday, February 15, 2010
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Sunday...Happy Valentines Day...Warning... Nude Picture
Happy Valentines + Happy Chinese New Year!
Xin Nian Kuai Le! Gong Hay Fat Choy!
It's also National Condom Day....
So much partying and so little time
Xin Nian Kuai Le! Gong Hay Fat Choy!
It's also National Condom Day....
So much partying and so little time
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Wicked Wednesday...My Sister Just Keeps'em Coming...
A Cardiologist's Funeral...
A very prestigious cardiologist died, and was given a very
elaborate funeral by the hospital he worked for most of his life...
A huge heart... covered in flowers stood behind the casket during
the service as all the doctors from the hospital sat in awe.
Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket was rolled
inside.The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful
heart forever.
At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all
eyes stared at him, he said, 'I am so sorry, I was just thinking of
my own funeral... I'm a gynecologist.'
The proctologist fainted.
The Badge...
DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas , and talks with an old rancher.
He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown
drugs." The rancher says, "Okay , but do not go in that field over
there," as he points out the location.
The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, " Mister, I have the
authority of the Federal Government with me." Reaching into his rear
pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the
rancher. "See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever
I wish.... On any land.. No questions asked or answers given. Have I
made myself clear? Do you understand? "
The rancher nods politely, apologizes, and goes about his chores.
A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA
officer running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis
bull......
With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems
likely that he'll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is
clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence
and yells at the top of his lungs.....
" Your badge.. Show him your BADGE ! "
A very prestigious cardiologist died, and was given a very
elaborate funeral by the hospital he worked for most of his life...
A huge heart... covered in flowers stood behind the casket during
the service as all the doctors from the hospital sat in awe.
Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket was rolled
inside.The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful
heart forever.
At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all
eyes stared at him, he said, 'I am so sorry, I was just thinking of
my own funeral... I'm a gynecologist.'
The proctologist fainted.
The Badge...
DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas , and talks with an old rancher.
He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown
drugs." The rancher says, "Okay , but do not go in that field over
there," as he points out the location.
The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, " Mister, I have the
authority of the Federal Government with me." Reaching into his rear
pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the
rancher. "See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever
I wish.... On any land.. No questions asked or answers given. Have I
made myself clear? Do you understand? "
The rancher nods politely, apologizes, and goes about his chores.
A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA
officer running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis
bull......
With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems
likely that he'll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is
clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence
and yells at the top of his lungs.....
" Your badge.. Show him your BADGE ! "
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Wicked Wednesday...My Sister Sends A Funny
Tinkle
A woman pregnant with triplets was walking down the street when a masked
robber ran out of a bank and shot her three times in the stomach.
Luckily the babies were OK. The surgeon decided to leave the bullets in
because it was too risky to operate...
She gave birth to two healthy daughters and a healthy son.
All was fine for 16 years, and then one daughter walked into the room in
tears.
'What's wrong?' asked the mother. 'I was taking a tinkle and this bullet
came out,' replied the daughter.
The mother told her it was okay and explained what happened 16 years ago.
About a week later the second daughter walked into the room in tears.
'Mom, I was taking a tinkle and this bullet came out.'
Again the mother told her not to worry and explained what happened 16
years ago.
A week later her son walked into the room in tears. 'It's okay' said the
Mom, 'I know what happened You were taking a tinkle and a bullet came
out.'
'No,' said the boy, 'I was playing with my self and I shot the dog.'
A woman pregnant with triplets was walking down the street when a masked
robber ran out of a bank and shot her three times in the stomach.
Luckily the babies were OK. The surgeon decided to leave the bullets in
because it was too risky to operate...
She gave birth to two healthy daughters and a healthy son.
All was fine for 16 years, and then one daughter walked into the room in
tears.
'What's wrong?' asked the mother. 'I was taking a tinkle and this bullet
came out,' replied the daughter.
The mother told her it was okay and explained what happened 16 years ago.
About a week later the second daughter walked into the room in tears.
'Mom, I was taking a tinkle and this bullet came out.'
Again the mother told her not to worry and explained what happened 16
years ago.
A week later her son walked into the room in tears. 'It's okay' said the
Mom, 'I know what happened You were taking a tinkle and a bullet came
out.'
'No,' said the boy, 'I was playing with my self and I shot the dog.'
Monday, January 25, 2010
Monday, January 4, 2010
Monday...Ghosts In The Machine..AKA..Computer Problems
Thats an understatement...
I'm working on it!
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